Last night, in preparation for the new Star Wars movie, Tom re-watched “Star Wars: A New Hope,” something he’d been looking forward to for weeks but hadn’t been able to find the time to do. But apparently I talked “too much” during the first thirty minutes and he felt the experience was “ruined.”
Strong words, I thought. Besides, how could Chewbacca’s anguished groaning or R2D2’s enigmatic beeping even begin to compete with my melodious voice?
For Tom, it wasn’t a competition at all.
“Go take a bath!” He said at one point.
Then, “Go read a book!”
And finally, “Just go to bed!”
I was so angry I didn’t speak to him for the rest of the movie and went to bed at 10PM.
Thankfully, mornings are for rebooting relationships. We breakfasted and watched the rain outside come down harder and harder, feeling cozier by the minute in our dry and toasty apartment.
My cousin texted me, suggesting I check out the new Adele song. There is really nothing more romantic than listening to Adele on a rainy day. I put it on and snuggled up next to Tom.
I’m a quick study, especially when it comes to catchy lyrics so it didn’t take me long to start singing along. I sounded pretty good.
Tom disagreed.
“You sound like someone sat on a toad.”
It was just like a movieeeee
It was just like a sooongggg…..
“Or like a homeless man shouting for money on the subway.”
It was just like a movie
It was just like a song
My God, this reminds me
Of when we were younnngggggg…..
“You’re just awful.”
The song ended and I went to replay it.
“I want to sing it again!” I said, but Tom had other ideas.
“Let’s go to the window and watch people who forgot their umbrellas get sogged.”
I felt then that perhaps all Tom wants for Christmas is some goddamn peace and quiet.
Which he probably won’t get.
Because all I want are compliments.
Anyway, here’s Adele instead of of me singing “When We Were Young.” Wouldn’t want, as Tom says, to “hemorrhage” what few viewers I have. Happy Thursday!
Also: Thom’s Thoughts on Thanksgiving and Anniversaries. And a last minute Christmas gift idea for that Star Wars nerd you know with dry nasal passages.
VERY HIGHBROW 